I would’ve never believed it in a million years. Me. Jane Proudfoot. Bitch extraordinaire. The girl only Neil Fleming, Grey Edwards, and Ryan Whittaker dared to mess with. Frozen in her spot as one of those three was having his life ripped from him. I knew it could happen. I always knew. I wasn’t pretending to myself that it couldn’t happen, and that isn’t why I froze, so drop the idea right now. I’m frozen because I didn’t think it would be so sudden. I’m probably an idiot, thinking it would give me time to shove Neil out of the way so I could shoot it dead. I thought if this ever happened I could shoot the thing and get Neil or anyone else to safety with just a small amount of Phantom particles inside. But here I am, hands shaking and mouth hanging open. I probably look stupid, but my legs aren’t working. If I move, I might fall. And what good is that to anyone?

I know Serge is looking right at us. The Captain too. I know that they’re probably shaking their heads, muttering "Good for nothing Proudfoot" under their breath. And to tell you the truth, I’m thinking it right now. I’m thinking a lot of things. Everything I’ve ever thought about Neil is running through my mind. Loser. Geek. The "Please" I muttered when he first hit on me. But then it changed. Funny. Smart. Kind. Cute. And he would die for me. So why the hell was I frozen? …It’s simple, really. Three words I could never bring myself to tell him, for fear of him laughing at me and walking away. I love Neil. I guess I just didn’t get the full effect of that until his body hit the ground. And I could never tell him. I could never see if he would laugh, or grin at me, or hold me, or kiss me, or even make love to me. And finally I can move again. Finally I can kick that fucking phantom’s big, dead ass. And I am. It’s nearly gone. Totally gone, except for this small bit. Once or twice more…the click of my gun brings me back to reality. I’m out. I glance over at Neil’s gun, but shake my head, putting my own gun down. Gray screams in my ear-- I can call him Gray now, right?-- and I shut him up. Words ring through my head, words my father spoke, and Gray and Ryan are most likely saying. " Failure." … "You’re not good enough." Never good enough. "You can’t do anything right, can you, Jane?" Guess not… "Look at me when I’m talking to you, Jane Proudfoot!" Is it the Phantom? Do they do that? Can they spout mocking words at you? Do they sound like everyone’s father or am I special? I look up at it anyway, with a feeling of utter defeat filling my stomach. I hope Aki and the rest make it. But now… right now I have to go see Neil.